Becoming a dad has brought to light many things that I did not know before. I thought I had life all figured out until little Baby J joined the throngs. So, as I learn these little lessons, or make these little observations, or connect the little dots, I will share them with you so that you all may know some of life's little idiosyncrasies. Here are some lessons I have learned in the first few days of fatherhood.
1. Anyone who has talked to me knows I have been critical in the past of newborns. What fun are they? They eat, poop, and sleep. Heard that one before? I'm sure you have. I like to have fun with kids. Play, kick, run, laugh, watch. Eat, poop, and sleep are not fun activities. But there is a dichotomy here. Even though newborns are boring because they only eat, poop, and sleep, as a parent all you want your newborn to do is.........eat, poop, and sleep. These are signs of a healthy, content baby. Is the baby not eating? Why? What's wrong? Not pooping? Oh crap! (pun intended) Not sleeping? It's the wife's turn to get up. You see the struggle here. I have completely shifted. ALL I WANT MY NEWBORN TO DO IS EAT, SLEEP, AND POOP and I will be happy.
2. 3+3 does not equal 6 when talking about hours of sleep. In the hospital the nursery took the baby so we could sleep and would bring her in every 3 hours for a feeding. 3 hours of sleep. 30-45 minutes of feeding. 3 hours of sleep. That DOES NOT EQUAL 6 hours of sleep. I never knew that before.
3. WARNING: THIS ONE IS GRAPHIC. I always thought that stool was something to be flushed down the toilet and forgotten. I never really got into the whole analysis of poop thing. Like the sink or float thing (although I understand Letterman loves that topic). I never checked for consistency, color, corn, or any other c's associated with stool. But, with a baby, stool is something to be monitored, observed, tracked, and recorded. Is it black? Is it brownie batter? Is it greenish-yellow? Is it once a day? Twice a day? There are certain standards by which a baby's stool is measured and it must be analyzed to see if it meets that standard. Fascinating.
There will be more observations to come. I hope these have been enlightening (if not disgusting). As I learn more about parenting, I will certainly pass those nuggets (again, pun intended) on to all you reader.
4 comments:
Funny observations from a sleep deprived brain. The good news is that being a parent gets a whole lot better than just monitoring messy diapers....so put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride.
being a nurse with loads (pun intended) of LTC (long term care) experience, i can identify with the whole poop monitoring thing as my patients and superiors demand it of me.
well, gotta go. it is ben's turn to bring a snack to school and i've got to bake some brownies (and if you really want to go there, pun intended). disgusting i know, but no worries, i really made snickerdoodles.
So you never addressed if being a parent of a newborn is fun or not. Has being worried about them eating, sleeping and pooping equated to fun on any level? I ask because I have had the same opinion as you about newborns.
Also, what’s with not having pics of the new addition??? Set aside the stools for a second and post some pics of the "little J" like every other dad would do...
Anonymous, we are greatly enjoying the ride. Thanks for the advice. i blog, I feel for the nurses at hospitals. They (at least the ones we had) are so great and are happy to take care of the patient, no matter what they are monitoring. Phill, everything is fun about being a dad. Even though newborns just chill all day, you are still so proud and can't get over that this little thing wrapped in blankets is your child. It is quite the feeling. Then you get to see all the faces they make, little sneezes and yawns, etc. It is very fun.
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